在<Why girl are weird>書裡看到的,好笑. This is my favorite time of the year becaouse there's absolutely no football. if you ever saw just how much football i have to watch,you might start crying. I've been dating Ian for over three years now and we've lived together for more than a year.He has no idea that i actually cant stand football. He doesn't know i find it repetitive and boring.How have i done this? How have i tricked this man into thinking i'm the coolest girlfriend ever? Because i am an expert at faking a football orgasm. If you break any of the following rules,it will be obvious that you are faking it,so be careful.Here we go. 1.Don't walk in front of the television while the ball is in play,while they are doing an instant replay,or while the ball is at something call"the line of scrimmage." 2.Walk(and by "walk",i mean "run")past the television only during the commercials. 2a.If you are watching the Super Bowl stay clear of the television at all times. 3.Offer beers to everyone when you stand up.You'll be the coolest girl there, and it's still a feminist move if you're already on your way to get your own beer. 4.Be familiar with shouting the words"asshole"and"pussy" 5.When the ref throws a flag(it's yellow),start shouting possible reasons why. try"Foul!" "Pass interference!" or "Face mask!"Don't worry,the boys will yell, too.Continue shouting through the ref explaining why the flag was thrown,at which point you will all stop and ask,"What was the call?" Then you will all argue about what the call must have been. 6.Anytime there is a call against your team,it is time for you to yell,"Oh, that's BILLSHIT!" Just like that.Try it.It's fun.I like to say it at the bank when they say,"It looks like you have five dollars in your account." 7.It is called a "touchdown."That's worth six points. 8.Then they try to kick an wxtra point.That's worth one.Generally they will get the extra point.If it is a close game,they may try for two points.We don't have enough time,so i'm not going into this here.Just trust me on this:If it is a close game and one team gets a touchdown,say,"Do you think they'll go for two?" This will cause a boy debate about field goals and ranges and red zones and things you don't need to worry yourself about.Just sit back and think,Oh,Yeah. You look so cool.See,girlie?We're gonna make it through this. 呵呵,還有很長的一段,不過這本書真的不錯看. --

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