作者shandidi (...)
看板CTSH92301
标题[转录]童子拜观音!?...什麽鸟!?没听过!!
时间Sun Nov 12 02:21:34 2006
※ [本文转录自 StupidClown 看板]
作者: seeingrain (.........) 看板: StupidClown
标题: 童子拜观音!?...什麽鸟!?没听过!!
时间: Sat Nov 11 03:58:16 2006
还记得宿营的戏，"西游记"里有一段叫什麽..."童子拜观音"什麽的..??= =a
每次验戏的时候演到那里都会让我突然想到一位同学
想当初高中时，一下课都会朋友约一约一起去厕所上厕所的经验
不过大部分都在聊天打屁
有一次我跟几个朋友照惯例一起到厕所
为了方便...我暂时称这几个朋友代号
A同学跟B同学还有我三个人到厕所去
男生的厕所只要一下课小便斗几乎是客满，而且每一排後面还会排很多人在等
这次我们全都要上厕所，所以每个人排一排，示意图↓
J J J J ←小便斗
O O O O ←放着狂战士正在飙尿的男人(-防)
O O O O ←充满着即将爆发尿液的认真的好学生
O O O O →同上
↑ ↑ ↑
A同学 B同学 我
等了许久，终於到我们前面的人尿了(感动)
这时B同学从他前面那个正在享受男人飙尿的浪漫的人的背影发现他是我们班上的C同学
B同学:[咦!?这不是XXX吗?哈哈!!]然後一脸邪恶的奸诈样...看来他是想趁C同学正在狂战士而毫无防御且无法反抗的情况下
对他做出不堪的事情...(C同学由於在班上很好开玩笑所以B同学不会对他有所客气，反而有一点放水会对不起C同学)
这时B同学的手势做了出来...哇!这就是传说中的千年杀吗??
B同学集气集了三秒，然後就在这个时候!!!!
啪嚓!!B同学双手的食指跟中指竟消失在C同学的屁股上
这可真谓一阳指的最高境界，连南帝一灯大师都有过之而不及啊~~
[赣!!!!!!!!!]C同学的惨叫声响彻整个厕所
这声"赣"字的惨叫是真的相当凄零，一个男人所发出的惨叫声，而且叫到後面快结束时还转音为假音，最後以稍微沙哑的气声渐渐淡出
这沙哑可真是沙的刚刚好、哑的恰恰准，好一个完美的结尾
而C同学的脸型面目似狰狞似挣扎，眼球外凸泛血丝，咬牙切齿、面部抽筋，而脖子的静脉、动脉、淋巴结和神经全都出来探头
咦!?!?!?!!??!!??!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?
!?!?!?!!??!!??!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?
!?!?!?!!??!!??!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?
C同学的脸???!?!?!?!!??!!??!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?
!?!?!?!!??!!??!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?
!?!?!?!!??!!??!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?
赣!!他不是我们所说的C同学....................................................
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B同学就这样愣住...
然後这位无辜的"伪C同学"转过身来，然後一巴掌往B同学脸上打下去，骂了一声赣!然後一拐一拐的走掉
那个背影我想我ㄧ辈子都不会忘记，那充满耻辱、惆怅、黯然、销魂的背影
我国中一直无法理解的"朱自清""背影"一文中所表达的感情，这时我总算能够体会朱自清那时的感受了...看着他的背影远离，我流泪了...
那背影好黯然、好销魂啊...
而爆点呢??大概就是那位伪C同学尿到一半被捅得裤子上布满激发的泪液....
还有B同学被那沾满属於男人的浪漫的手一巴掌打在脸上......
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◆ From: 140.134.242.141
1F：推 jzn:XD 11/11 04:02
2F：→ firehand:C同学~~纳命来~~凸 11/11 04:03
3F：推 lenjoyn:听说我某高中强者同学在军训课时做过一样的事= =+ 11/11 04:04
※ lenjoyn:转录至看板 KS95-319 11/11 04:06
4F：推 allen70610:哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈~~~~半夜大笑中 11/11 04:14
5F：推 lanline:好痛～～～ 11/11 04:21
6F：推 asubelieve:这真的不推不行!!!!好黯然好销魂XD 11/11 04:29
7F：推 polar17:XD 11/11 04:32
8F：推 DarrenTao:痛... 11/11 04:32
9F：推 clhd:赣 害我狂笑 XDDDDDD 11/11 04:37
10F：推 tchky:沙的刚刚好、哑的恰恰准，好一个完美的结尾 11/11 04:39
11F：推 BleuCiel69:本日最佳文笔就是你啦!!!!!!(颁奖) 11/11 05:28
12F：推 sos3366:不推不行啊 XDDDD 11/11 05:38
13F：推 alinmoai:我笑了XD 11/11 05:40
14F：推 wheels:KS!! 好样的学弟...你们现在也来这套啊.... 11/11 06:03
15F：推 fatso:干好酷!!!!!!!!!! 11/11 06:07
16F：推 duckie1121:我的老天爷啊~~整个是笑到肚子超痛的!! XDDDDDDDD 11/11 06:35
17F：推 alanpipi:怎麽不是"喔".............那会更刺激XD 11/11 06:57
18F：推 athomas:一早就大笑 今天心情会很好 11/11 07:00
19F：推 cctina:好好笑 >u< 11/11 07:12
20F：推 GreenNicky:XD 11/11 07:22
21F：推 HukataNami:形容得超好@@+ 11/11 07:37
22F：推 himurajacky:啊哈哈哈哈哈哈.... 11/11 07:39
23F：推 pest:手没有洗的一巴掌 11/11 08:09
24F：推 Still28:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 08:22
25F：推 howshouw:空格少点 这绝是笔极品....(摇头) 11/11 08:32
26F：推 Luxemburg:转音为假音 XDDDDDD 11/11 08:48
27F：推 kendawx:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 08:51
28F：推 devilcavalry:文笔将笑点整个展露出来啊XD 11/11 08:56
29F：推 pcgamelee:可怜的伪C同学 11/11 09:10
30F：推 biscuit125:干～ 笑翻XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 09:32
31F：推 imeder:转音为假音 XD 11/11 09:41
32F：推 anrris:超好笑 XD 11/11 09:47
33F：推 JasonSin:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 09:47
34F：推 kingheros:好可怜的伪C同学阿XDDDDDDD 11/11 09:51
35F：推 iowaya:XDDDDDDDDDDDdd 11/11 09:51
36F：推 st4123:XDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 10:08
37F：推 ferryw:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 10:11
38F：推 always18:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 10:17
39F：推 sigma2003:XDDDDDDDDDD...真的好好笑 11/11 10:20
40F：推 camuskiroro:XDDDDDDD 好个朱自清 好个背影 ~~XDDDD 11/11 10:30
41F：推 dhero:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 10:33
42F：推 klubin:XDDD 11/11 10:35
43F：推 adonistung:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 10:49
44F：推 xien721:超好笑XDDD 11/11 10:52
45F：推 mu0102:赣！！！！！XDDDDDDDDD 11/11 10:55
46F：推 delavino:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 11:17
47F：推 kodato:XD 11/11 11:25
48F：推 scapegoat:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 11:45
49F：推 colorma:好好笑~XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXD 11/11 11:45
50F：推 Cheney0318:赏你一个XD 11/11 11:46
51F：推 weiche216:笑到翻过去了 XDDDDDDDDD 11/11 11:47
52F：推 fox3:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 12:02
53F：推 mooninsnow:好悲惨喔>口< 11/11 12:10
54F：推 f18811881:赣~~~!!! 11/11 12:10
55F：→ lifeking:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 12:23
56F：推 mayday198076:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 12:31
57F：推 end61728:哈哈~ 11/11 12:34
58F：推 newyorklions:推啊~~ 11/11 12:47
59F：推 abilet:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 12:52
60F：推 genjuromkiii:你为什麽要代替小便斗... 11/11 12:53
61F：推 DanielP:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 13:06
62F：推 dammbob:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 13:26
63F：推 pinkdemon:可怜的伪C同学啊～在最没防范时受到攻击 11/11 13:34
64F：推 desirefun:超好笑的啊～～～ 11/11 13:36
65F：→ mosquito3467:干!看到认识的了~!! 11/11 13:46
66F：推 shiuan409:可怜的伪C同学XD 11/11 13:56
67F：推 thegod13:我笑超久的阿阿阿阿阿XD 11/11 13:57
※ thegod13:转录至看板 KS95-318 11/11 13:58
68F：推 mlikcat:超好笑.....XDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 13:58
69F：推 Elivanta:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 14:00
70F：推 uainken:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 14:05
71F：推 ston1002:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 14:11
72F：推 ATAJDEM:好黯然好销魂的文笔啊 推一下推一下 XDDD 11/11 14:17
73F：推 mysterymo:借转 谢谢 11/11 14:20
※ mysterymo:转录至看板 NTUmed95 11/11 14:21
74F：推 starlone:你为什麽要代替c同学... 11/11 14:24
75F：→ tretrefly:看不太懂 11/11 14:43
76F：推 brings:哈，还蛮好笑的，很生动XD 11/11 14:44
77F：推 Lorchune:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 14:45
78F：推 Jessica9869:超好笑的~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 11/11 14:59
79F：推 beatrizjuan:文笔很赞啊 超好笑的XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 15:08
80F：推 sharry:笑超久的啦XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 15:11
81F：推 fish0112:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 15:15
82F：推 haggis:文笔好妙XDDDD 11/11 15:23
83F：推 hatasky:有笨点....... 11/11 15:30
84F：推 blackkane:干 笑死我了..... 11/11 15:45
85F：推 ms1121:重点是还没洗手啊!!!!! 11/11 15:53
86F：推 bohun:囧~~现在不是都叫千年杀 11/11 15:55
87F：推 slex:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD笑死我了 11/11 16:12
88F：推 kyhsiuan:你的文笔真的很棒呢～好好笑XDDD 11/11 16:14
89F：推 superior119:狂笑中XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 16:14
90F：推 ayuandjack:XDDDDDD笑到翻掉 文笔真好!!!哈哈 11/11 16:19
91F：推 tupacshkur:XDDDDD 11/11 16:20
92F：推 roger0918:好黯然好销魂啊XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 16:33
93F：推 gn00063172:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 16:44
94F：→ gn00063172:黯然销魂赣? 11/11 16:45
95F：推 eastsea:好笑 11/11 16:48
96F：推 HADYKID:XDDDDDDDDD 11/11 16:50
97F：推 bard614:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 16:55
98F：推 trsa:我笑到肚子好痛XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 17:06
99F：推 zforlong:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDd 11/11 17:07
100F：推 cathyting:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 17:15
101F：推 krain1:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 17:19
102F：推 snowforever:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 17:21
103F：推 kuo1102:段皇爷：要练我家的一阳指，你还未够班！ 11/11 17:22
104F：推 CRYM:文笔真妙XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 17:28
105F：推 bullskoala:XDDDDDDDD超好笑 11/11 17:37
106F：推 clyden:-.-我看成 那位伪C同学尿到一半被捅得裤子上布满激发的尿液 11/11 17:37
107F：→ seeingrain:那个激发的泪液是尿液没错，只是个暗喻 11/11 18:03
108F：推 Roof37:报啊 11/11 18:05
109F：推 yiyun1125:好北七XD 11/11 18:07
110F：推 idpyyu7582:XDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 18:08
111F：推 f575739:这真的是XDDDD 11/11 18:08
112F：推 shell922:98 快爆了 11/11 18:09
113F：推 boltsky:XD 11/11 18:11
114F：推 peridot:文笔实在是生动到不行呀XDDDDDDDDD 11/11 18:45
115F：推 bilif:我以为C同学会突然括约肌松弛之类的勒~~~ 11/11 18:57
116F：推 lsc69536:我笑到肚子痛了 11/11 20:34
117F：推 prononhead:我国中同学做同样的事情,足足被打了十分钟...(?) 11/11 20:35
118F：推 kenny750730:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 20:39
119F：推 xxx22088:虽然很不道德不过我看到形容还是笑了 b下场也是罪有应得 11/11 21:01
120F：推 ann111451:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD哈哈哈 11/11 21:04
121F：推 spiritia:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 21:16
122F：推 WineCheese:沙的刚刚好、哑的恰恰准，好一个完美的结尾 XDDD天啊 11/11 21:26
123F：推 inale:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 21:35
124F：推 biteAss:文笔真好推一下....狂笑XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 21:35
125F：推 kunbu:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 在公司鳖笑好痛苦阿!! 11/11 21:41
126F：推 ofkofk:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 22:49
127F：推 spfd:请问~~~什麽是验戏啊? 11/11 22:52
128F：→ zhou:XDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 23:09
129F：推 juliehome:超好笑~~笑到流泪了~~~ 11/11 23:11
130F：推 chocobos:笑死我啦~哈哈哈哈XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 23:19
131F：推 asco12781111:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD太好笑了 11/11 23:37
132F：推 nsmmsn:XDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/11 23:55
133F：推 Judicator:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/12 00:07
134F：推 q8q:XDDDDDDDDDDD 11/12 00:18
135F：推 lishinglele:超好笑....我大笑了....哈哈哈 11/12 00:26
136F：推 megaboost:文笔超好啦!!!!!!!!!!!! 11/12 00:45
137F：推 superyas:看完鹦鹉後...伪C：这个局我布很久了!!! 11/12 01:13
138F：推 TOUCHLOVER:承认你就是B同学吧 11/12 01:13
139F：推 bonny0512:我笑到脸抽筋了啦~~~ 11/12 01:24
140F：推 pths40:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/12 01:36
141F：推 AchiU16:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 11/12 01:42
142F：推 DawnSunrise:佳。 11/12 02:02
143F：推 wchf8:XD 笑到肚子痛了 11/12 02:10
144F：推 how1earn:好笑!! 11/12 02:16
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145F：推 ovsp:哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈 经典 11/12 02:48