[转载] C罗自传《Moments》（１３） 转载自：红魔曼联中文球迷论坛 www.manut.com.cn http://www.manutd.com.cn/forum/thread-71827-1-1.html 父亲的去世 我一直非常爱我的父亲 Dinis Aveiro。不幸的是，我再也见不到他了，但是我还是 感到他离我很近。 他一直活在我的心中，不管我在做什麽，不管我身在何处。始终有那麽多关於他美好 的回忆。因为他对於我成为一名足球运动员发挥了重要的作用，作为一个人，作为一个男 人。他的确是塑造我今天成就的人之一。 他从来不掩饰他对我的自豪和骄傲。即便是当我在安德瑞哈踢球的时候，他在那个球 场当设备技术人员。他每天都会跟别人说我在比赛里面的表现。如果我打进一个进球。我 就知道我会在进家门的时候获得一个小小的惊喜，他点上蜡烛，拿来蛋糕，还有很多好东 西，我们来一个家庭庆祝。 我父亲跟我经常在一起，他看我训练，给我建议，我们一起吃午饭。这就是一天我们 要做的事情。当别人说我好的时候，他就不说话，非常高兴，兴奋，自豪。但是如果有人 说我的不是，他就马上言辞激烈的辩解。他的朋友们，非常了解他，有时候也会拿我表现 不好的比赛来取笑他。很自然，他回击：他辩驳，疯狂，他不允许别人批评我。如果我在 下一场比赛进球，或者有好的表现，他第二天清早就拿着厚厚的报纸发给他的朋友们，当 成是复仇，当然是没有恶意的。不管什麽情况，他都不会停止。看我踢球让他热情洋溢， 他跟我共享我对足球的热情。 在联赛里面，安德瑞哈（Andorinha）是比较弱的球队。当我们跟其他强队，例如︰ Maritimo、Machico 或者 Camara de Lobos 打比赛的时候，我们当然会被进很多球。我 记得有一次我不想参加一场比赛，因为我早就知道了比赛的结果，可能是15-0。「我去那 里於事无补。」我想。当我父亲发现我不在更衣室的时候，毫无犹豫，他冲回家里，告诉 我，只有弱者才会放弃。他鼓励我，把我带去球场，让我上场。我们当然失败了。但是我 也被我父亲的热情感染。他是让我不放弃足球的功臣。我的母亲，也对足球很热情，常常 告诉我父亲，让他把我带到他工作的俱乐部。渐渐的我学会了什麽叫做负责任。 本菲卡是我父亲和弟弟们喜爱的球队。但是他的自豪没有因此而减弱。看到他的儿子 ，土生土长的马德拉人，在葡萄牙的大陆一家俱乐部踢球，足以让他感到高兴了。当我签 约曼联的时候，他高兴到了极点。他一次一次的陪伴我，支持我，鼓励我直到他病倒了。 我们会为我们深爱的人做任何事情，但是不幸的是他的命运就是这麽定的。 2005年9月6日 我当时在莫斯科，我跟葡萄牙国家队跟俄罗斯踢一场2006年世界盃的资格赛。那天是 周二。 我被斯科拉里叫去的时候，正在我的房间里看电影。我到了他的房间，菲戈，那时他 是我们国家队的队长，早就已经在哪里了。我感觉很奇怪，但是我几乎不敢相信他们带给 我父亲去世的消息。对我来说震惊太大了。我什麽都不知道了。我的头就像突然泄了气的 气球。我无法思考，一切都是茫然。 「克里斯蒂亚诺，如果你想回去，我们马上给你订好航班，你可以回去。」斯科拉里 说。「不，不，我想留在这里，我明天想打比赛。」我回答着。这些是第一句进入我脑子 里的话。但是是真诚的真心的。我告诉他他可以相信我，告诉他，会有一些糟糕的时间， 但是这场比赛他可以依赖我，这也是我唯一想做的，成为比赛的一部分。我想这也是正确 的。我做这个决定是为了我自己，不是任何人，又或者也是因为任何人。我想不出更好或 者更坏的决定。我不知道我不回去会不会帮到任何人或者伤害任何人，或者其他的。当时 我唯一的想法就是在莫斯科跟俄罗斯打比赛。「我将为了我父亲的荣誉而战。我是为了他 而打比赛。」而且我也做到了。 在比赛的当天，更衣室，甚至是热身的时候气氛是沉重，奇怪。我队友的表现也比较 不一样。他们很沉静，压抑，悲伤，他们不知道该怎麽做才好。我走向他们，跟他们说， 他们必须要放松，必须要表现的自然。他们要像平常一样。如果因为我，他们表现不寻常 的话是不对的。我鼓励他们笑起来。我觉得我必须激励他们，提高他们的士气。而且我也 像平常一样做了该做的事情。任何人知道我在更衣室里我都会玩球，跟几个队友。所以第 一次我开始故意这样做，是让我减少压力，让我的队友相信他们要恢复到往常的表现。 对我来说，这是非常困难的。我的父亲在我的脑海中。我一直努力的进球。每场比赛 都是如此。但是这次，实际来说，太特别了。 斯科拉里，我也曾经说过，在如此困难的时期发挥了非常重要的作用。实际上，在这 场比赛训练的时候他允许我可以回到伦敦去陪我病重的父亲。「不要忘记，家庭永远是第 一位的，然後才是足球。」他告诉我。我拒绝了。就在这个时候我跟斯科拉里的友情也更 加的深厚了。当他把他父亲去世的故事告诉我後，我们两个相拥而泣。他的话很温暖。他 理解我，支持我，跟我力量。 上帝让我父亲离开。我对他的离去很悲伤，但是这就是生活。人总会死亡，每个人都 会如此，或早或晚。但是当这个人是家里的人时，一切就变的很复杂了。很多次，当我在 家里的时候，我感觉到他的存在，「不要那麽做，不要，不要这样，这不适合你。」有时 我听到他给我的意见。他一直在我的左右。 这是非常艰难的时刻。非常艰难。但是我们必须走自己的路，我们不能停下来。我的 兄弟姐妹都会感觉到生活的空虚。我跟我的家庭都无法弥补这麽巨大的损失。我们都深爱 着不在我们身边的人，但是我们必须勇敢，必须向前看。生活是那麽的短暂，让你无法沉 浸在不好，压抑和可怕的想法里面。因为这样我也不想对死亡展开深入的讨论。 有一天，我跟我的母亲聊天，突然，她告诉我让我毫无防备，「有一天，我会离开我 的孩子们，我会看不到他们，不能再保护他们。」我的双眼充满泪水。为什麽，为什麽我 的父母会在生命中的某个时刻这麽说？我马上转换了话题，没有任何犹豫，我不喜欢这样 ，这样让我感觉很沮丧。所以我深信我们要好好的利用生活带给我们的东西，享受生活， 因为生活太短暂了，所以我相信人们在死後会有不一样的生命。或许我们再也无法相见， 但是我们一直有相见的信念。今天我们生活在这个世界里面，我们要好好的享受现在的生 活。我们要欢迎一切发生在我们身上的事情，而不必考虑多麽深奥的道理。 ─────────────────────────────────────── My father's death I loved and still love my father, Dinis Aveiro, very much. Unfortunately, I cannot enjoy his physical presence any more, but I always feel him close to me. He is alive in my mind, whatever I do, wherever I am. I keep many fond memories of him, because he was fundamental to my development as a football player, as a person, as a man. He was truly one of the people responsible for what I am today. The pride he had in me was all too evident and obvious, even when I first started to kick the ball in Andorinha, where he worked as an equipment technician. Not a day went by when he did not tell everyone, in detail, everything I had done, in every game. Whenever I scored a goal, I knew that when I arrived home I would have a surprise waiting for me: he brought me candy, cakes, many sweet treats, we had a great family celebration. My father and I were always very close. He watched my training sessions, gave me advice, and we had lunches together. This was a daily routine. When he realized everyone around him was praising me, he would not utter a word, completely delighted, excited, and very proud. But if anyone dared to make a less positive comment about me, he would argue strongly in my defense. His friends, who knew him well, would take the opportunity of a not-so-good game to tease him. Obviously, he reacted: he argued, he got mad, and he never allowed anyone to criticize me. If I gave a good performance in the next game, or scored a goal, he went there the next day with a huge pile of newspapers in his hands, which he had bought very early in the morning, to give one to each of his friends, like a small revenge, but without malice. He would never shut up, whatever the circumstances. Watching me play was his passion, and he felt deeply joyful for sharing my passion for football. Andorinha was one of the weakest teams in the championship, and when we played against stronger clubs, like Maritimo, Machico or Camara de Lobos, defeat was invariably certain and by many goals. I remember one time that I decided I did not want to play in a certain game because I already knew we were going to lose, probably some 15-0. "What am I going to do there?" I thought. When my father found out I was not in the dressing room, he did not hesitate. He headed home, talked to me, explaining that only the weak give up. And so he encouraged me, took me to the ground and I did play. We were thrashed, of course, but I was infected with my father's enthusiasm. He was ultimately one of the people responsible for my not giving up football. My mother, who was also passionate about football, repeatedly insisted to my father that he should take me to the club where he worked. Gradually, I learned responsibility. Benfica was always the club of my father's heart – and my brother's. But his pride was not diminished by that. To see his son, a native of Madeira, in a Portuguese mainland club, was motive enough to fill him with joy. When I signed for United, he was totally ecstatic. He was with me many, many times, accompanying me, supporting me, encouraging me, right until the moment when he fell ill. We do anything for the people we love. But unfortunately his fate was already determined. September 6th, 2005 I was in Moscow, with the Portuguese national team, which was playing a 2006 world cup qualification match on the next day, against Russia. It was Tuesday. I was in my room, watching a movie, when I was summoned by Luiz Felipe Scolari. I went to his room, where Luis Figo, at the time the captain of the Portuguese team, was already waiting. I thought it was odd, but I could never have imagined that the news they had for me was about my father's death. It was a shock for me. I had no feeling. My head felt like a balloon that was suddenly deflated. I could not think about anything. Absolutely nothing. "Cristiano, if you want to, go. We will make your flight reservations immediately, and you can go to your family," Luiz Felipe Scolari told me. "No, no, I want to stay here, and I want to play tomorrow," I answered. Those were the first words that sprung to my mind. But they were honest and sincere words. I told him he could rely on me. I told him there were going to be tough moments, but that he could count on me for that game, and that my only wish was to be part of the game. I thought it was the right thing to do. I took that decision for myself, not for other people, or because of other people. I did not wonder if my decision would be better or worse for me, I did not wonder if my presence near my father would help or hurt anyone, or anything. The only thought that crossed my mind was about staying in Moscow and playing against Russia. "I am going to play a game in honor of my father, I will play for him." And so I did. On the day of the match, the mood in the dressing room, and even during the warm-up period, was heavy, it was strange. The behavior of my team-mates was not normal. They were very quiet, distressed, withdrawn, not knowing what their correct attitude should be. I went to them and explained that they had to act naturally; that they had to be themselves, that it made no sense to alter their behavior just because of me. I encouraged them to laugh. I felt the need to stimulate them, to lift their spirits. I tried to do exactly the same things that I always did, precisely to put across that message. Anyone who knows Cristiano Ronaldo knows that in the dressing room I am always playing with the ball. Myself and a few other team-mates. For the first time that was not happening so, to relieve the tension and to show them that the team's behavior should be the same as usual, I started to play with the ball. It is undeniable that it was hard for me. Very hard. My father filled my thoughts. It is true I tried to score a goal. I try to in every game I play. But this goal would, in fact, be different, it would be special. Luiz Felipe Scolari, as I have already mentioned, played a decisive role in this moment that was so difficult for me. In fact, even during the training for this game, he gave me permission to go back to London to be near my father, who was then seriously ill. "Never forget that family comes first, and only then comes football," he told me. I refused. At that exact moment my friendship with Scolari began to strengthen. We both cried when he told the story of how his own father died. He was warm, he understood me, he comforted me, he gave me strength. God wanted my father to go. I felt outraged by his physical disappearance, but that is just the way life is. People die every day, and we know that all of us, one day, will disappear. But when it is a person in our family, everything is much more complicated. Many times, when I am at home, I feel his presence. I cannot explain it, but sometimes I feel that I hear his advice: "Don't do that, don't go that, don't go that way, that is not the most suitable for you." He is always by my side. Those were very rough times for me. It is still rough. But we must all follow our own path, we cannot stop. My brothers and sisters and I still feel a void in our lives. Neither, I nor my family, have yet been able to completely overcome this loss. We still love someone who is not physically present, but we must be strong, and keep moving forward. Life is too short to spend with negative, depressive and morbid thoughts. For this reason I do not like to engage in deep conversations about death. One day I was talking with my mother when, all of a sudden, she made a declaration that caught me completely off guard: "Some day I am going to leave my children, and I will never be able to see them and protect them again." Tears filled my eyes. Why must parents talk about this, after a certain point in their lives? I had to change the subject immediately for, without a doubt, I don't like it, and it makes me feel extremely uncomfortable. Therefore, I believe in the need to make good use of what life has to give us and to enjoy it fully, for it is short. I believe that there may be some kind of life beyond death. We may never meet directly, but that dream will become infinite. Today we are here, in this world, and we should enjoy life to the full. We should welcome everything that comes to us. Without the need of deep philosophical thoughts. -- ★ ╔╦═╮╔╮ ╭╔╮ ╭╔╦═╮ ╔╮╔╮╭╦═╮╔╮═╮ ☆ ☆ ╠╬╦╯╠╣ ║╠╣ ║╠╣ ║ ╠╣╠╣╠╬═╣╠╣ ║ ★ ★ ╰╝╰╯╰╝═╯╰╝═╯╚╯═╯ ╰╰╯╯╰╝ ╰╰╝ ╰ ☆ ☆ SCORING MACHINE︰ Ruud van Nistelrooy ★ ╔╮═╮╭╦╦╮╭╦═╮╭╦╦╮╔╦═╮╔╮ ╔╦═╮╭╦═╭═╦╮╮ ╔╮ ╠╣ ║ ╠╣ ╚╩╦╮ ╠╣ ╠╬╣ ╠╣ ╠╬╦╯╠╣ ║ ╠╣╚═╬╣ ╰╝ ╰╰╩╩╯╰═╩╝ ╚╝ ╚╩═╯╰╩═╯╰╝╰╯╰╩═╯═╩╯╰═╩╝ --

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