作者nalthax (书虫一枚)
看板Translation
标题Re: [英中] 关於叙事逻辑
时间Mon Jan 14 01:39:39 2013
※ 引述《adrolian (深蓝)》之铭言:
: 另一个例子是:
: Harry wonders why on earth Snape is here as he watches him across the room.
: He looks out of place amongst the soft chintz and sandy wood of the
: Weasley’s sunny kitchen, like a long black splinter. Mr and Mrs Weasley are
: talking to him quietly in a huddle in a corner, all crammed together by the
: sink and the over-piled draining board. Snape’s eyes are remaining low,
: restlessly skirting over the tiled floor. His skin is waxy and grey and his
: hands are gripping the counter top hard enough to turn his knuckles white,
: like it’s taking all his effort to keep himself upright.
手痒回一下
当哈利眼光越过房间,看见斯内普像根黑色的长刺一样,
格格不入地站在韦斯莱充斥着柔软花布与浅棕木材的厨房时,
他很纳闷地在想为什麽斯内普会在这里。
在厨房杂乱的一角,堆满了碗盘的滴水盘与水槽旁,韦斯莱夫妇低声地对他说着话。
斯内普的目光仍然低垂着,不安地来回扫视着磁砖地板。
他的皮肤蜡灰,而他的手紧紧抓住流理台面,使得他的指节泛白,
彷佛光是站直就费尽全力。
: 因为觉得照原文的顺序翻译读起来会很奇怪,所以我在译文上做了调整。可是这样似乎
: 少了原文里一开始要传达的那种有点震惊、疑惑的味道。
一开始翻译是照着字面翻,然後是加很多字来解释(词面)的翻法,
然後是自己重整过顺序的翻法,一步步趋近贴近原文及译者母语语言经验的翻法
在累积阅读和写作经验的同时,随着语言素养的增长,
读到的意思跟写出来的意思会越来越相近
加油~
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※ 发信站: 批踢踢实业坊(ptt.cc)
◆ From: 114.39.169.34
1F:→ pentimento:请教第二句 he looks 的 he 是 Harry 还是 Snape? 01/14 08:49
2F:推 adrolian:谢谢nalthax。你的译文真的比我顺眼很多很多,在此深深感 01/14 09:57
3F:→ adrolian:谢你的提醒,我会试着做做看的! 01/14 09:58
4F:推 adrolian:to pentimento:第二句的he指的是Snape。He looks "out of 01/14 10:01
5F:→ adrolian:place" 01/14 10:02