我来翻译好了 = =" 恩... 翻译不好就没有办法了... ※ 引述《FoBenJa (FoBenJa)》之铭言： : These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things : people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published : by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges : were actually taking place : ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? : WITNESS: No, I just lie there. 律师: 你是否还有性行为... 目击者: 没有, 我只有躺着... : _______________________________ : ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth? : WITNESS: July 18th. : ATTORNEY: What year? : WITNESS: Every year. 律师: 你的生日是? 目击者: 7月18号 律师: 哪一年? 目击者: 每年... : _____________________________________ : ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment your car struck the other : vehicle? : WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. *这个翻译成中文就没有笑点...* : ______________________________________ : ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? : WITNESS: Yes. : ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? : WITNESS: I forget. : ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? 律师: 这个 myasthenian gravis 症状, 对你的记忆有影响吗? 目击者: 有 律师: 对你的记忆有什麽影响? 目击者: 我会忘记东西 律师: 你会忘记? 那你能举个例子 你曾忘过什麽事情吗? : _____________________________________ : ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you? : WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which. : ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you? : WITNESS: Forty-five years. 律师: 你儿子几岁了? 跟你住一起的那个 目击者: 38 还是 35... 我忘记了 律师: 他跟你住多久了? 目击者: 45年... : _____________________________________ : ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? : WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?" : ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? : WITNESS: My name is Susan. 律师: 你老公当天早上对你说的第一件事情是什麽? 目击者: 他说 "凯西, 我在哪里?" 律师: 这为什麽让你伤心? 目击者: 我的名字是苏珊... : ______________________________________ : ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, : he doesn't know about it until the next morning? : WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? 律师: 医生, 当一个人在睡梦中死去, 他应该到隔天早上才会发觉他已经死亡了对吧? 目击者: ... 你真的有通过考试? : ____________________________________ : ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? : WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one. 律师: 最小的儿子, 那个20岁的, 请问他几岁? 目击者: ㄜ.... 他21岁... : ________________________________________ : ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? : WITNESS: Would you repeat the question? 律师: 当你被偷拍的时候, 你人是否在场? 目击者: 你问什麽??? : ______________________________________ : ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? : WITNESS: Yes. : ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? : WITNESS: Duh............. 律师: 你是在8月8号怀孕的? 目击者: 对 律师: 那你在当天做了什麽? 目击者: ㄟ.......... : ______________________________________ : ATTORNEY: She had three children, right? : WITNESS: Yes. : ATTORNEY: How many were boys? : WITNESS: None. : ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? 律师: 他有三个孩子对吧? 目击者: 对 律师: 几个是男生? 目击者: 0 律师: 那有女生吗? : ______________________________________ : ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? : WITNESS: By death. : ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? 律师: 你第一个婚姻, 是怎麽结束的? 目击者: 死亡 律师: 那是谁死了导致你的婚姻结束? : ______________________________________ : ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? : WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard. : ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? 律师: 你能描述那个人吗? 目击者: 他差不多XXX公分, 然後有留胡子 律师: 这个人是男的还是女的? : ______________________________________ : ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition : notice which I sent to your attorney? : WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. 律师: 你现在的穿着, 是你被法官罢免工作之後的穿着? 目击者: 不是, 我工作一直都是这样穿 : ______________________________________ : ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead : people? : WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. 律师: 医生, 你几次验屍, 是在验死人? 目击者: 我每次验屍都在验死人... : ______________________________________ : ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? : WITNESS: Oral. *翻译出来怪怪的... 笑点不见 = =* : _____________________________________ : ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? : WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. : ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? : WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an : autopsy on him! 律师: 你记得你是何时验屍的吗? 目击者: 验屍是8:30晚上开始的 律师: 那XXX在那时候已经死了? 目击者: ...没有, 他坐在解剖台上, 也不知道我为何在对她进行验屍!!! : ____________________________________________ : ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? : WITNESS: Huh? 律师: 你有验尿的资格吗? 目击者: 蛤?? : ____________________________________________ : And the best for last: : ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a : pulse? : WITNESS: No. : ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? : WITNESS: No. : ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? : WITNESS: No. : ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you : began the autopsy? : WITNESS: No. : ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? : WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. : ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? : WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and : practicing law. 律师: 医生, 你验屍之前是否有看她是否有脉搏? 目击者: 没有 律师: 你是否有看她有没有血压? 目击者: 没有 律师: 你是否有看她有没有呼吸? 目击者: 没有 律师: 那当你在进行验屍的时候, 那个人是否有还可能活着? 目击者: 不可能 律师: 你为何这麽肯定呢, 医生? 目击者: 因为那个人的脑袋已经放在我桌子上的瓶子里了... 律师: 可是, 那个人是否还有可能是活着的? 目击者: ... 对, 有可能活着, 而且还在当律师 = =" --

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